I wish I knew Natalie Portman. Seriously, though. She seems really cool.

Well, I'm gonna go ahead and pull a K-OS. This post has nothing to do with Natalie Portman, but doesn't the mention of that song title hook and intrigue you? And didn't her alluring and exquisite face invite you to this post?

Wicked.

Anyways, I'm approaching the end of my two-month hiatus from careerland, and I couldn't be more ready to move on from being eternally available and mostly unproductive. Though, there certainly have been some good times. (Fashion TV is now a lot more like my religion than a hobby.)

I watched Vicky Cristina Barcelona today for the 4th time (instead of cleaning my room - again, I take full responsibility for my extreme laziness) and in it Cristina aka Scar-Jo says she is currently "at liberty" rather than unemployed. I like this saying, and I often felt that way. 

But, how, I ask, does one get the money to go to Barcelona for the summer while "at liberty?"

Alas, the best news of my liberty-phase was in the form of a contractual agreement offered to me by APTN during the Olympics to pull me out of this bind and leave me with just the kind of money to get away!

Which leads me to my New Years resolutions for 2010, and my 23rd year of existence!

(I promise, it really will tie in.)

1) Go overseas. I have the time, I'll be acquiring the money, and good lord am I ready for the adventure!! I've wanted this for so long and decided to get my schooling over with, and now here I am. Hopefully joining cousin Ashley in India in March!! (Could I pick a pricier flight?)

2) Help people more. I've always been happier when I'm making other people happy or making some kind of a difference, which may be selfish, but it really does make you feel like you have something to offer and feel more connected with people. I keep missing my emails to confirm a session in the soup kitchen, but resolve to make this happen in early 2010 and continue with the trend throughout the year!

3) Make this my fittest year of existence. Now this may be a super-typical one, but this was the first year I've even paid for a gym membership and I had a workout plan made, so pff! who says I won't continue with the commitment in 2010? Plus, I've started doing major portion control and avoiding indulgences, and I feel that must make me so much more committed since I'm starting before the new year (not like those other poseurs..? ;)) JK. I'm rooting for all of us!

Anywhoo.. I may as well throw in something about Natalie Portman because she is super awesome and more people should realize it. Like I really think I'd wanna hang out with her. First of all, there's her acting ability (See: The Other Boleyn Girl, Closer (as a stripper!!) and Brothers; which wouldn't have had any legs without the brilliant casting); then there's her Harvard degree; and oh, yeah, her elegant beauty that is so deep she can rock a bald head.

PS, this: 

Yeah, she did. She fuckin' rapped on SNL.

This Christmas

I'd say this Christmas has been the most successful for me in regard to spending QT (and doing some serious binge-drinking) with those I love most.

I've visited friends in different provinces, spent weekday nights dousing my palate with cheap wine, Swiss cheese fondue and having great conversation after hoots!

I've visited with my cousins I love, privately over coffee and together with the whole fam. I've made both my grandparents laugh and seen them enjoy a meal and everyone's company.

I've even dressed as a mandarin orange for a Christmas party in which I fell downstairs trying to piggyback my BFF/other half of my mandarin orange team to victory in a costume contest. (Expect my YouTube debut shortly!)

I've met with friends new and old, made some new friends, renewed some old friendships that were neglected by long-distance strains, and most likely started some of my own Xmas traditions! (That aren't as depressing as watching Home Alone alone on Christmas Eve... a real old one I had!) 

I even did a day of volunteering for the Christmas Cheer Board and will be starting at Agape Table soon — a tradition of helping people I hope to continue into the new year!

Perhaps the best thing I've taken from This Christmas is that you should dwell on what you do have over the holidays, and not what you don't. When it comes to prezzies, friends, family, jobs, relationships, etc. And not only at Christmastime — I truly think it's the key to happiness year-round.

I didn't even put together a wish list this year except that I asked for one piece of technical equipment which I think could really help my blogging/career in the long run... in that it needs to include nice photogs!

Until next week, I wish you all a Christmas of good wine, great shared conversations, and truly happy memories!

Warm fuzzies,

Bren.

Oops, I did it again..

Oops! Forgot to blog for a while. Hopefully I'm better at managing my hair than my blog, though I'm sure some would disagree (red is a bitch!).

In order to make up for two weeks' blog time, allow this to be an intro to the next one...

Simply acknowledging my failures as blogger and excusing my hiatus from the one thing I love most. (What a Frotchloser!)

P.s.: My roots are bad....

In Our Lifetime

I usually only blog once a week (which, even then, it's become a delayed Sunday night endeavour) but I saw a commercial on the plane that I had such an emotional response to that I had to share it before Sunday at 11:59 p.m.!

I dare you to not get goosebumps and/or single-teary-eyed over this beautiful creation. I've never felt like the end to cancer was so conceivable or prouder of the progress made so far.

Enjoy!

Literally Inspired

Yeah I saw SYTYCDC live on Friday. Yeah I Photoshopped a picture of myself with the relative unknown who also had particularly large quadriceps (like my own).

WHO WEARS THEM BEST?

Sweeney and Brenlee's List of Vanccomplishments

Sweeney:

1) Zero nosebleeds.

2) Bought first pair of pantyhose. They worked: 2 makeout seshes that night.

3) Helped to navigate a 16-bus detour in downtown Vancouver spanning roughly only 10 blocks.

4) Cupcakes eaten for dinner: 1. 2. OK, 3.

5) Gay hag opportunities: 1.

6) Creative uses of pantyliners on foot: 2.

Brenlee:

1) Umbrellas lost: 2.

2) 18-piece sushi order totaling under $5: 1.

3) National television stations broken into and applied to: 1.

4) Gay hag kisses: 1.

5) Cases of potential H1N1: 1.

6) Instances of pantless daytime attire: 3.

Shared successes:

1) Did astoundingly accurate impressions of wet rats after walking downtown to Cafe Crepe.

2) Being mistaken for a gay couple.

3) Dodging security at Skytrain stations.

4) Scalping 'Nucks tickets.

Shared failures:

1) Moving to better seats for said game.

2) Navigation of one block or more.

3) Unnecessary trips to the airport: 1.

4) Trips to Whistler: 0.

Jumpin' the Bandwagon...

I know I'm ultra-late on jumping the bandwagon on these, but in case anyone else was w/out C (cable, not child) in the last year, here are some of the best things you've been missing:

Matthew Morrison on GLEEEEEEE (SO obvious, but seriously, this week sealed the deal for my true crush on Mr. Schu! It's been too long since I had a real schoolteacher crush, and I can't go any longer!!)

Also, Jane Lynch (Glee cast member and a personal fave comedienne) rocked my socks as usual on Conan.

Here's a taste:

Did I mention Conan, is also awesome?

If anyone else has been skipping over the After Show with their PVR, try catching it in reruns or stay tuned next time if you actually watch The Hills or Peak Season live. Jessi Cruickshank and Dan Levy might be the most entertaining, and at least most intelligent, part of the package.

The duo are only getting better with Dan doing a body reveal and Jessi doing a special on Kenya. Unfortunately, I can't embed it, but you can check out Dan's almost-6-pack on Clip 2 of the Aftershow on MTV's website (his shirtless bod is the image for the link at http://www.mtv.ca/).

And last but not least... I caught my first episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm on Shaw On Demand's freebies this week, and they. Are. Unbelievably. Awesome.

The Seinfeld creator creates his usual magic in the mundane and I die of embarrassment for his character each week because it's so relatable. Check it out if you've been awash with me for the last few years. (OMG, it's in its 7th season.... Bandwagon jumping.. Better late than never!.?!)

Watch Larry try to convince Jerry he's changed his take on reunion shows:

4 Femmes I’m Grateful Four…

1) Amy Poehler: woman of the year? Heck yes! Glamour magazine placed Poehler among its Top 12 females of the year for heading the hilarious sitcom Parks and Recreation, making sporadic, much appreciated returns to the Weekend Update desk at SNL, nailing the role of surrogate mother with a low IQ on Baby Mama, and being way, way too cute and likable! Check out the highlights from the Top 12’s acceptance speeches!

2) Leighton Meester as the new XXXtina?

I can’t get enough of her bitchy shenanigans on Gossip Girl, her surprising tenderness as girlfriend to the doubly sexy Chuck Bass on the same show, and her sultry singing voice! Oh, and her seXXX appeal! After assisting with the chorus on the super successful “Good Girls Gone Bad” with Cobra Starship, she’s opened up the world to taking her solo career more seriously, and her moves don’t hurt! Check out her newest video:

Well played, Meester!

3) The entire cast of Nine. But in the interest of keeping the theme, my newest obsession among the cast: Penelope Cruz. I latin love(he)r! After getting the wrong impression of her from dating the horrendous Tom Cruise, and thinking she was a typical Spanish beauty we’ve all seen before, I have crossed over. Vicky Cristina Barcelona was like her debut into fabulousity for me, and seeing her as ScarJo’s muse totally convinced me why she’s been able to build a career as a director’s muse and has been cast as a director's mistress in Nine! Forget Be Italian, Be Latin!

Here's the movie trailer... *drools with envy*

Editor's note: She was also fierce in Blow. I was just too young and naive to notice (it came out in '01!!)

4) Gaga in her new vid. Her with big eyes. Her in a negligee. Her with wicked 3-foot hair. Her:

 

Just Like Clockwork..

Doooddllllu, dooodlu, dooodlu...

Ok, maybe the time switch isn't as dramatic as an awesome throwback moment from Wayne's World, but it really is pretty fuckin' confusing.

Did I, or didn't I change my clock? Which clocks are changed in the house?

Does it mean I gain an hour or lose some sleep? (All accounting and actuarial students, disregard this. The rest of us spin trying to figure this out.)

Also, how the F do I change half of my clocks (think new cars, cell phones... anyone still wearing a watch?)

I found myself questioning an awesome premise as I awoke in an unusually wide-awake moment early Sunday morning (it was Halloween the night before, so I'm guessing I was dehydrated and restless, making me weirdly wired and alert. PS: whoever dictates the time changes out there: post-Halloween day, not your best work).

What if we were allowed to redo an hour along with the time change, and even change decisions made during that time? Like everyone had to forget what happened because the universe gave us a second chance?

We all pretty much widely accept that leaving the 204 means everyone drops their relationship statuses, so why can't we agree to let the universe (or the time-change dictator) give us a new hour, for real?

I bet Halloween night led to a bunch of decisions and messes that could be repaired by one hour of damage control. 

Note: Any babies made on Halloween night is the only exception to this. Permanent things like cells splitting and chromosomes aligning have to stay on the clock. 

But overall, Wouldn't it be nice?

I celebrated this new holiday/re-do day I conceptualized by bleaching my whites I wore to a Halloween party.. and it worked! (Miraculously? We're talkin' red wine, permanent stuff.)

I might have already beat the universe with this clockwork reversal thing!

(Hmm.. And my costume was Alex from A Clockwork Orange... Coincidence? :))

30 boxes

This Monday I had a steady job with, eh, steady-ish income, a pension, and benefits. Plus a move-in date scheduled on a new condo. 

By Tuesday, I had to exercise the run-of-the-mill backup plan: moving into my parents' house. And my life in 30 boxes...
I am hardly a victim in the media world — getting a job at all was a blessing.

I am less so concerned with belabouring over the layoff and more so with determining what's to come — travel, freelance, an appearance on a reality show? — and I'm genuinely excited about figuring it out.

Right now I'm leaning towards taking care of the things I've neglected while attending school full-time and quickly snappin' up a f/t job: namely my fitness and getting out into the world.

By no means am I going to bury my pen and pad for good — I imagine documenting any venture I take on will be a large part of my growth during whatever's next.

Rolling over ain't my thing — but a nice, significant hiatus may be just the thing to make the most of my unemployment status, fresh start and young age. I think a prompt re-entry into the media world could turn out to be a missed opportunity. 

That's all I've got for now! Looks like this Frotchstar could get more interesting...

Read on! x's/o's.

Excess and Success: The RWB's Moulin Rouge

"I hope you don't mind — I hope you don't mind, that I put down in words... how wonderful." Well said, Ewan. Although this particular vocal medley and, well, actually any vocal medley, were absent from last night's RWB performance, rhythm and beauty were aplenty.

Just the symphony, set and costumes were enough to make even the coldest heart melt and start believing in a love that begins to stew after one meeting and probably less than 3 minutes. The RWB literally kicked off their 70th anniversary season with an unforgettable, and likely record-setting performance. Advance ticket sales were sky-high, allowing the ballet company to pas de bourree on another two matinees, and the first night was a full house. Although I can't speak for everyone in my age group (though I will) I think it's fair to say that this is one of the most trendy and anticipated shows for our age group ever to grace the Centennial Concert Hall in our lifetimes.

I really can't, however, use my relationship with the movie Moulin Rouge as a baseline, because I know it is far from the norm. (I know each vocal sequence by heart and can harmonize from either side of the male/female duets...) But I will also say that European culture and especially bohemian Paris as a theme is generally a oui, oui! for most of us, too. (Even if you didn't cry for Satine or know the history of "The Red Mill.")

Which brings me to my only complaint for this post: Student-priced tickets (priced at about $30) were taken up so quick most of us missed them like you would miss the little green fairy if you tried to look for her the day after you drank absinthe. Gone were the tickets in a quick dissolve, and when the other two shows were added, I assume they were taken up just as quick.

I am grateful that my maja felt the desire to treat me to the eye candy, but I had originally had plans to go with two of my peers who had to back out because of the costliness. Because we young'ns are the future RWB spectators, and since it is an anniversary year, I question if they could have maybe done something out-of-the-box and philanthropic like adding a student night for only student-priced tickets. I venture the concert hall would've filled up, and I don't know if this would've made them money or lost them money, but in the grand scheme I think it would've been a great way to 'hook 'em while they're young' and keep the RWB going another 3/4ish-century. (Side note: How fun would that have been!? And potentially less classy.. though most young people in the crowd on the first night were the ones who seized the opportunity to dress up.) 

Anyway, that's my one suggestion box-type toss-it or keep-it. Now to the goods: Notable dances were the first can-can when you finally see the girls do the infamous dance the Moulin Rouge is credited for developing to the classic tune, and a well-choreographed dance-off/paint-off between two of the male leads, Toulouse and Matthew. These and the I-can't-overemphasize-how-awesome set and costumes almost made me forget to expect Nicole Kidman to swing out and break into a reworked vintage Madonna track, or expect Harold Zidler's bellowing creepiness. Shout-out: A friend I met in the summer working at a downtown restaurant was IN THE SHOW! She totally held her own and I confidently suggest we'll all be seeing a bunch more of her. Go Beth! Until next time, 

"Come what may, Come what may. I love you, until my dying day," faithful reader. x's/o's

ZOMG

Author's Note: Turns out this contest ain't for "professional news writers." Though I'm ecstatic to be considered under this label, I guess I have to bow out and leave the Olympic dream to others. Enter at: www.journalismdream.com.

Zoh. Em. Gee. (No idea what the 'zed' is for by the way, I've just seen this before and thought I'd use it for emphasis.) If I invented a contest, I couldn't think of a better one for me to enter than the 2010 Vancouver Olympics' journalism showdown. 

However, I may have inadvertently screwed myself backwards and forwards when I entered a one-letter entry to "test" the website and see how an entry works. Great. 

I tried to go back and reverse this colossally erratic act when I saw my submission was permanent, and then ended up re-sending my 'letter e' entry only to find you can only enter the writing comp once. (And, of course, I tested the site with my real name. Was I a natural blond before this!?)

Anyways, the directions surely were misleading: They said to send a story or photos you've taken at a sporting event you went to.

Then it says "Write about it. Take Pictures."

Write about the story, or the actual goings-on at the event? (if-so-facto, just sending the original report of the event?) Wtf, eh?

Later it says to convey your passion for sports, along with capturing the glory, heartbreak, humour, artistry... you get it, of sport. 

But there's only one entry to make. Should I be present in my story, or should it just be so all-encompassingly awesome that the simple coverage of a game shows my own passion? (See my confusion now?)

Needless to say, I'm gonna try to gather some old stories from my trusty i-Book, but I sure as shit dunno if I'm gonna get another chance, or if I have anything compelling enough to put me ahead of the race with other reporters competing to cover the Olympics for the Globe and Mail. Soo dreamy. 

I guess I'll just interpret the assignment loosely, and have faith in whatever I put forward. I thought my personal account would fare better than the odd atom female hockey game I've covered, but that doesn't sound like what they want.

Athlete/reporter would die for this shot/or the peewee A2 girls bring home the prize?

Which has more drama? Which might get neglected for butchering the guidelines?

aaargh.

Faux-Frotch

Faux-frotch (n) pron. f-OH-FRAW-ch: One thing you'll learn quick about me is I lub me my abbrevs. Frotch is the residue of the label 'fire crotch' rolled into one.
And what-the-faux?
You got it: I'm fakin' it.